I can’t quite put my emotions into words today.
My children and I are leaving our beautiful home in the country. A spacious barn conversion with exposed beams, a log burning stove and three acres of land, It was our dream home. A forever home. A home with a view.
We kept chickens, grew veg, watched stunning sunsets and looked at constellations in a huge sky unspoiled by light pollution. It was idyllic.
I woke up to these views for nine years.
And loved it through every season
Although, the beech hedge was always at its most resplendent in autumn.
I have hosted countless birthday parties, Mother’s and Father’s day lunches, girls’ nights in, a hen party, two First Holy Communion breakfasts, several Hallowe’en parties, numerous Easter Egg Hunts. We were once snowed in for weeks and sledged day after day in the field. We played football, cricket, tennis and golf in the garden. I’ve taken countless penalty shots against my son, in a goal net replaced by a larger one each Christmas. I taught my daughter to throw and catch a tennis ball.
And every year, we had an enormous Christmas tree.
I hope my children will take away happy memories.
I’ll miss it.
But home is where the heart is and my heart is with my children. Two remarkable young people who’ve shown unbelievable strength, resilience and maturity beyond their years.
A house move will always be stressful and the circumstances resulting in this move have seemed, at times, almost insurmountable. Nobody should be put in this position. But the whole scenario has reassured me what I knew all along. That it is the people that make a house a home. Along with health, it’s all that really matters.
With the unconditional love and constant help from my parents, brothers and sisters-in-law, and with unwavering support from my friends, I, we, have come through the other side, stronger. We’re positive, happy and raring to go. I’ve made new friendships. Ones that would never have happened if things had been different. Existing friendships have deepened. I’ve achieved more on my own than I could have imagined which has given me the confidence to believe that I can deal with anything. Everything has a new perspective and I feel like my old self for the first time in many, many years. (It doesn’t take a genius to work that one out…)
I can’t stop the tears now as I write, but as one door closes, another opens. (Not on my brand new home sadly, but in temporary accommodation for a short while- a minor inconvenience by comparison)
And so, I leave with some sadness but with lots of optimism and excitement.
This isn’t just a new chapter. It’s the start of a whole new book.